child swap

Forget Wife Swap.

I told Amara we were swapping her for another daughter.

My evening was ending quite simply. I was driving home from a Girl Scout leader meeting, ready to dive into a piece of meatloaf that I knew was waiting for me at home.

That's when I got the call.

I could hear Amara sobbing in the background.

Dad2Amara explained he wanted our daughter to repeat to me what she had said to her father.

My crying child picked up the phone and pleaded her case without telling me exactly what was said.

She said she was sorry.

She said she was kidding.

But still, I had no idea what was going on.

Then she said it.
"I want new parents. You don't love me."
I did everything I could not to laugh aloud.

I know the gravity of what my five year old said. And Dad2Amara was having none of it.

But seriously? New parents?

Next thing you know, she'll be packing up a suitcase and telling me she's running away.

So I finally arrive home. And I of course must ask Amara what she was planning on doing when I would no longer be her mom.

I questioned whether her new mom would teach her Tagalog.

Or if her new mom would call her "girlfriend" or "Bean."

I told her I wanted a daughter who was kind and polite.

So we would be swapping her out soon.

And that set off a whole new set of waterworks.

And got me the most sincere apology I've ever heard from my child.

Wrong? Probably.

But Amara and I both got a good set of hugs and kisses out of it.


  1. Sounds just like my little drama queen. Where do they come up with this stuff?

    I'm waiting for the "I hate you!" I'm not sure how I'll react. It hasn't happened yet but it's only a matter of time.

  2. My youngest is my hot-tempered one. He has called me the "meanest mom ever" when I won't do something he wants. He can really work up a big head of steam. When he is done,though he is usually very remorseful and needs cuddles.

    I tend to stay pretty calm throughout these little scenes. And sometimes, I make the mistake of laughing (like when he storms into my room just to slam my door) but even a trace of a smile can just make him madder.

    Everyone always says about D.,"He is always so good natured."
    I always answer, "Except when he's not."

  3. You want to swap kids? You get two for one. What a bargain!!

    My youngest was just busted for flushing paper towels down the toilet at school, trying to flood the bathroom. All this in first grade.

    All in your new house...bwahahahahahahahahah...

    See you at 8pm Friday...

    Hope your insurance is paid up..

  4. LOL... Well at least she learned that she should be careful what she says, because words said in anger can be very hurtful to all involved!


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