Day 23

I'm leaving my Mom behind. I have to go back to work.

Dad2Amara is still without a steady full time job. So I can't take unpaid family leave.

I exhausted nearly all of my vacation and sick time.

And now Mom's nurse practioner says we may be on the roller coaster again.

Mom has been having more and more visions.

She still sleeps. A lot. But she's breathing better. And her vital signs are good.

Now we're back where we started. We don't know how much longer we have.

So I'm going back to work full-time starting Monday. I'll get Amara off to school, work, then head to hospice.

I hate the thought of leaving my Mom. I don't want her to wake up without a family member there. She already complains when we leave the room for a minute. What if something happens when I'm not there? What if she leaves this world without one last goodbye from me?

I hate cancer.