five things I learned in 2012

I began the year with such high hopes. 2011 was less than stellar, and 2012 started off with a bang (and lots of pecan pie). But the divorce dragged on, and upon my arrival to the promised land of singledom, well, quite honestly, the year still sucked. My moving costs (and life in general) ended up being more than what I had anticipated. The days without Amara felt like never ending eternities. And my longing for the city has been magnified threefold.

Yet I still grew. Sure I probably reverted back some, trying to recreate a life I didn't get to experience. Yet I realized you have to keep moving forward. Looking back at the past keeps us from reaching our dreams.

But that's not all I learned in 2012.
  1. "Love is hope. It fuels our dreams, and if you're in it, you need to enjoy it because love doesn't always last forever." Yep, I unwillingly snubbed my reality TV obsession and watched "Once Upon A Time" with a friend. Snow White is living proof that fruit should not be a part of my diet. Mulan proved women are just as capable as men. I love a good fairy tale, so it should come as no surprise that I am hooked on this show. Happily ever after may be questionable at best, but I still believe in true love. Just sometimes the timing isn't right.
  2. We all stand to lose at one time or another, but we can also gain so much. Oh, I've learned this lesson 25 times over in the last year. Literally. Remember this? Apparently by gaining my sense of self, I also gained half of that weight back. I take full responsibility. It's been months since I've hit the trails and gone for a run. And I have a unhealthy love for white rice. And cookie dough. I know I'll lose again. And I will gain. Yet no matter, I'll continue to move on.
  3. There's always something stronger than a stiff drink. I enjoy my glass of Cabernet. Always have. I adore Katie, the bartender at a local steakhouse. But she - and the Mandarin and Seven's she always has ready for me - was not who I needed in my life. I am a stubborn bitch. I'm an independent woman. But I know now I must also rely on people stronger than myself. I have experienced firsthand what extraordinary measures those strong loved ones are willing to take to ensure I'm on the path towards fulfilling my dreams. Wine can't do that.
  4. Change is inevitable  I hate this lesson. HATE. But people change. Circumstances change. And life is too short to harbor hate. So we have to move on from the change we cannot accept to achieve happiness. 
  5. Money isn't everything, but it can make you happy. I can't pay my bills, provide for Amara, or enjoy life without cash. Paycheck to paycheck is no fun. A little money can go a long way.
I've come to terms with 2012. No matter how tough things get, I can move on. The amazing people in my life never cease to surprise me with their capacity for generosity and goodness. They taught me these five lessons.

And these lessons make me who I am.


  1. You certainly have learned alot and from learning similar lessons, I can tell you that it will only make you stronger. I love the changes to your blog. I hope that 2013 brings with it good health and much happiness for you. You have been through and you deserve wonderful things.

  2. Aww, keep believing in love! You deserve it and will find the perfect, most wonderful love! (p.s. I love love me some once upon a time!)


    1. Seriously, Once Upon A Time? I can't love you anymore than I do now!


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